Letters To The Editor

It's not like I haven't been writing the last two weeks. Yes, we were on vacation in Greenbelt, Maryland and with our friends Ellen and Spencer in Virginia Beach. My sister came back to Morgantown from Greenbelt with us and it's just been one glamorous party after another so far this month. I've gained a few pounds. This morning (Monday the 13th) I was back at the gym.

In my last post, I said I wasn't going to answer the editorial in the Bland County Messenger decrying the fluidity of gender, race and sexuality in our society. Then I couldn't sleep, so I did write a letter. Jeff Simmons, the publisher of the newspaper, asked if he could run my response as an op-ed the next week. Here it is, titled "A Visitor's Perspective":



Since moving to Morgantown just three years ago, my crazy retirement project has been to visit every county within three hundred miles, one a month, in alphabetical order. If a county is more than two hundred miles away, I stay over two nights. This is how I came to visit Bland County..

I was warned that there would not be enough here to keep me occupied, and indeed, the tourist literature usually makes it clear that Wytheville is the center of this region. Wythe County will probably be the last county I visit. I should be ninety-nine by then.

I was fortunate in the weather here, and the beautiful scenery. People were kind to me, like the women at the motel who came in and brought fresh towels and straightened up late in the afternoon after I told them they didn't have to  because I was asleep after lunch when they would have cleaned. The man at the Virginia Welcome Center spent time listening to why I was traveling, and helped me find a short stretch  of the Appalachian Trail to hike. The woman working at the library listened to my rant about what I read and don't read on trips, and the young man at the sub shop offered me extra napkins.

I'm sixty-five and not looking for a night life in any case, or fancy stores selling overpriced junk. I was fine with what was available here to do.

I picked up The Bland County Messenger today, and I was disturbed by the editorial, concerned about "moral relativism," the nature of truth, and what is a lie. In my trip this week, I only mentioned a spouse once, although I wear a wedding ring. My spouse is another man who is a few years younger than I and works full time. I often travel alone. We were fifty-five and forty-eight when we met ten years ago, and the idea of marrying each other was off our radar, until it became possible in California, where we lived in 2008. We did it because it was available to us, and like everyone else who marries, it was a way of affirming to our family and friends that we are a couple. I now think it was the best and most conservative thing we could have done.

As to the media changing people's perceptions of morality, I generally agree with your editor. We don't watch network television to not be influenced by advertisers and people who do not have our interests at heart. I cringe when I hear about celebrity couples who are "engaged" when they have children together. I lived in Los Angeles and saw streets filled with homeless people while others owned multiple houses and collected cars.

I strive for compassion for others. I wonder at the need for "American Owned and Operated" signs on establishments here. I saw how a woman working at a restaurant gave the skinny tattooed couple who came in for a sandwich a disapproving look.

I remarked to myself at the things I was able to hide here. I dressed in a long-sleeved shirt and jeans today. I look youngish and healthy, but I wear support hose for my bad veins, and I have bruises on my arm because I take blood thinners. I'm basically Caucasian, but my racial heritage is ambiguous. I'm Jewish by birth and by choice. My grandparents were immigrants. And yes, I'm a gay man married to  another man.

I couldn't help thinking that I might not have been treated as well here had I been with my spouse, or if I spoke English with an accent.

There is no danger of Bland County being overrun by gay people, transgendered celebrities or foreigners. Still, I would hope that a gay, lesbian or transgender kid growing up here would be accepted as a part of the community, and not bullied, shamed or called a sinner.

This new morality isn't necessarily new. My parents found out I was gay forty years ago, They didn't take it well at first. My mom died before I met my spouse, but she told me she would attend my wedding to another man, if I ever found one.

I enjoyed my stay here and I do respect the people who live here. I have a blog post about my trip at http://www.yearthreemorgantown.blogspot.com.

Barry Lee Wendell


Lots of people congratulated me and Joe when the Supreme Court decision came down allowing same-gender marriage nationwide. There were howls of protest from our Republican Senator, Shelley Moore Capito, and our Republican Congressperson, David McKinley. There was a nasty letter from a minister in a church in a rural community not far from here. I wrote back, and that letter was published Sunday, July 5, in our local paper, The Dominion-Post. Here it is:


I've seen this movie before. During the 1964 Democratic primary in Maryland, when I was in ninth grade, George Wallace ran and won on a platform of segregation and states rights. Some churches quoted Scripture on why God wanted the races separated. Now it's the Republicans, not (mostly) the Democrats, screaming "States Rights" and many of the same churches quoting Scripture against the decision allowing same-gender couples to marry.

It's still religious bigotry. Reform Judaism, the Episcopal Church, Unitarians, some Presbyterians and other churches choose to bless same-gender couples. Those that don't scream "God's law!" and "Biblical marriage!" Please read the Bible. Multiple wives, concubines, buying a teenage girl from her father. That's Biblical marriage.

I've been married to another man for more than six years. All this ranting and raving will not change that. We are religious people. If you are a politician in Morgantown, and you are dissappointed in the Supreme Court decision, or think the state should decide who can marry, let me talk to some engaged couples so I can vote on whether or not they should be allowed to marry. If you think you represent me, and you oppose my marriage, you don't represent me. Please stop sending me your newsletters and requests for support. If you are clergy and you oppose my marriage, let me know where your church is and I promise not to ever go there. And stay out of my religious life, where you have no right to interfere.

I'm retired and my spouse's job is secure. The people I worry about are those same-gender couples who have bravely stepped up and declared their love for each other, risking their livelihood against bosses who feel they have the right to interfere in the most intimate part of an employee's life.

Barry Wendell


There was a letter today from a woman near Morgantown. She quoted Leviticus about "abomination."
I found out from a quick internet search that she is a widow, probably in her 80s, and that she and her late husband attended a Nazarene church. I felt sorry for her that she has nothing better to do then worry about other people while she is (I presume) eating her morning bacon and eggs. Bacon is also an abomination in Leviticus.


I still have to write about our trip and the week since we've been back. We are now, as of the evening of July 11, in our fourth year here in Morgantown. This may necessitate a new blog. Stay with me.

The Election

My initial dismay at the national and West Virginia election results has become more rational. Nationally, the Republicans wiped the floor with the Democrats. Here in West Virginia, we will have a majority-Republican House of Delegates for the first time in many, many years., and although the state Senate election resulted in a tie, a Democrat was convinced to change his party affiliation to Republican to give the Republicans a majority. I wonder if he was paid to do that, and if so, how much?

I don't know if the Democrats could have gotten around the hatred that has been fomented against President Obama by Karl Rove, Roger Ailes, the Koch Brothers, and locally, coal mine operators like Bob Murray of Murray Energy, who owns mines here in West Virginia. When we arrived here in 2012, the state was awash in "Stop Obama's War On Coal" signs and bumper stickers and even license plates that say "Friend of Coal."

Our junior Democratic Senator, Joe Manchin, came up with a simple law, along with a Republican from Pennsylvania, to close a loophole that allowed anyone to buy a gun at a show without any kind of check. He was subjected to a blowback of hate from the gun lobby. I think he must have been shocked at the ferocity.

With all this as background, it's no wonder that Natalie Tennant, from all reports a good person, the Democratic Senate nominee to replace retiring Jay Rockefeller, ran against Obama and the EPA. In a debate on public radio with Republican nominee Shelly Moore Capito, Tennant stated over and over that she was raised on a farm and owns a gun. For her part, Capito only stated, over and over, that Tennant supported Obama.

In West Virginia, with its palpable dislike of outsiders and racial minorities, it's hard not to think Obama's race had something to do with this. Capito had been in Congress, and no one could point to anything she accomplished in the last few terms. She presented no agenda except stopping Obama and the EPA.

It didn't help that the Supreme Court wouldn't hear the case for maintaining the ban on same-gender marriage in West Virginia. President Obama, at least in his second term, has been a supporter of gay rights, and I'm sure that rankled people here and in other states. West Virginia passed a law against same-gender marriage a few years ago, with only three dissenters: two here in Morgantown and one in Huntington. One of the two in Morgantown, the first African-American mayor, was defeated in this election. In our district, we have gone from three Democrats and two Republicans in the legislature to four Republicans and one Democrat. Voters here could press one button to vote "all Democratic" or "all Republican." People should have had to vote for each office. Republican campaign materials tended not to state which party the candidate belonged to.

I voted for Tennant, maybe because singer-songwriter Carole King came here to support her.  I'm not sure that King, a well-known liberal, a Jew and a New Yorker by birth, was helpful to the campaign. She got me to vote for Tennant, but I'm not a typical West Virginian. I was sorely tempted to vote for The Mountain Party, whose views are closest to mine. Their problem is that they have no chance of winning.

I read Kathleen Parker in our local paper, The Dominion-Post, this morning (November 13). She blames Democrats for alleged lies about The Affordable Care Act. She is upset that people lost their insurance despite promises that they could keep their insurance. That was always conditional on those policies meeting certain standards, which many of them didn't. I don't believe it was the big issue she states it is. I think she knows that and is just looking for something to throw at President Obama. She's delusional if she thinks, as she says, that the Republican victory was about "restoring that trust" in government.

I think the Republicans won by limiting voting among African-Americans, who vote overwhelmingly for Democrats, by nefarious reapportionment schemes, difficult ID laws, and not accepting new registrations, even though they were filed timely. I credit the Supreme Court with allowing "dark money" to pollute elections, and overturning The Voting Rights Act, allowing mostly formerly-Confederate states to impose new restrictions on voting that would adversely affect African-Americans.

There is no denying that Democrats could have done a much better job of presenting themselves. They could have stood up for the ACA and promoted clean air and water, even in West Virginia. In our district, Democrat Glen Gainer ran almost no campaign against Tea Party favorite David McKinley, a climate change denier.

If the Republicans are proud of their victory, I'm fine with it. They got it from Democratic timidity, racism, homophobia, cheating on the rules, and money from only the top 1% of our economy. Maybe a majority of voters are fine with that. I'm not.